Check-In Round
"What has your attention"?
The newly formed crack(s) on my phone’s screen and how I’m convincing myself not to get it repaired as a reminder to maybe use it less. Like, some kind of digital memento mori.
A Journal Glimpse
This week I’m going to do something a little different and just share something I wrote in my journal the other day. One of my favorite things to do is to fire up the Notes app and use my Apple Pencil to hand write a journal entry that I’ll transcribe into Day One at a later date. I wrote this entry last night as I sat on the balcony and listened to the rain:
“I think part of what I’m wrestling with is that I’m trying to think and write about “big” things (meaning, living a “good” life, etc.) which can be overwhelming, but through the lens of the mundane, which can seem trite. The end result is that I get too overwhelmed to write about the big stuff (“who am I to be writing about this anyway?”) and when I turn my attention to the small stuff it feels inconsequential at best, glib or naive at worst. How do I crack this nut? Simply naming the phenomenon as I just did, is probably a good start. Other than that, I’m inclined to say that I should just start writing about the mundane stuff the best way I know how and try to connect it to the bigger ideas as I can.
Traditionally, I have struggled when I don’t have a clear picture of the whole project in my head and I think that’s why I’m struggling to just write regularly. I don’t have an outline so therefore I think I can’t write.
I think I struggle with figuring out how to write about this stuff in a way that isn’t just my narrow perspective. I keep trying to say things about “work” and then realizing there is no such things as a universal experience of “work.” Maybe I should just start relentlessly writing about the very specific and sometimes weird things I do? Ground it 100% in my experience and don’t even try to make it more broadly applicable? Maybe just literally write about my inability to write cogently about this stuff? And maybe through that process I’ll learn what I actually have to say?
I’m putting too much pressure on myself to be profound. Working at The Ready has made me second guess whether what I have to share is actually worth it. I feel pressure to make sure everything I write will always impress my incredibly bright colleagues. That’s too high of a bar. I need to get out of their heads and crawl back into my own.”
What Has My Attention
Ryan captures a lot of what I think I mean about “deliberate attention” in this article about how you choose to engage with activities or circumstances that are less than ideal. It’s about having a fundamental engagement, rather than disengagement, with what’s going around you. It’s about how you use your ability to pay attention to craft an experience for yourself that ultimately helps you in some way.
Margin is what allows things to run smoothly, especially when plans go awry. Agile software development teams do this when they limit their work-in-progress but somehow it seems like people struggle with adopting this concept when it comes to how they live their own lives. I see it with my clients all the time. Calendars that are booked with back-to-back meetings all day long with no wiggle room to speak of. A schedule like that requires a complete lack of surprises to not get knocked askew and once it does, it sets off a chain reaction of problems. True adaptability and productivity is leaving enough margin in everything to allow you to respond calmly and creatively.
There’s a big difference between snacking on a book and letting yourself sit down to a full course meal. Sometimes I get into periods of time where I read in very short bursts and whenever I’m able to break myself out of that mode I find myself enjoying my reading much more.
Closing Round
Eating: Had an extremely delicious dinner at Jaleo in Crystal City for the second time. And after being kind of underwhelmed by Epic Smokehouse the last couple times I went, I had a pretty incredible rack of ribs and coleslaw this time around. There’s something about that restaurant, though. I’ve been there three times and I’ve forgotten my credit card their twice.
Drinking: Working through a bit of a backlog of my YES PLZ coffee beans. Tasty, as always.
Reading: Still very much on a minimalism/simplicity kick. Finished The Importance of Living (it had its moments of deep wisdom and even more moments of deep misogyny) and am now flipping back and forth between How to Do Nothing and The Abundance of Less: Lessons in Simple Living from Rural Japan. Oh, also listening to Utopia for Realists on Audible.
Working: Had back-to-back full-day workshops with the client last week and I was struck by how utterly draining that can be. It gave me flashbacks to my teaching days where I was constantly exhausted and dreading the next day. In the moment, when I’m in the room and doing my thing, I love it. It’s the evening after, when I know I have to do the whole thing again tomorrow, that’s tough to handle. This week should be a little calmer, even though I have a quick trip to Raleigh for a half-day workshop.
Playing: Played Super Smash Brothers Ultimate for the first time ever (which is also the first Super Smash Brothers game I’ve ever played). For whatever reason I never really participated in the SSMB craze back in the day. It was fun to play with my buddy across the country, though. We also played some Super Mario Kart, just like old times. When we were roommates in college it was the primary way we divvied up household chores.
Listening: Stumbled across a band called Heron while perusing my New Music Mix on Apple Music. A good addition to my Sound of Productivity playlist.
Yours in intentionality,
Sam